Opinion: The Fallacy of “The Kids Will Find Out”
It’s a sentiment meant to offer solace to the targeted parent, a belief that one day, the truth will come to light, and justice will prevail. But in the complex web of manipulation and emotional abuse characteristic of parental alienation, this assertion rings hollow.
Parental alienation, a form of psychological manipulation where one parent systematically undermines the child’s relationship with the other parent, is a corrosive force that erodes family bonds and leaves lasting scars. Despite its devastating impact, the prevailing wisdom suggests that children will eventually see through the facade and recognize the truth. However, this assumption fails to acknowledge the insidious nature of parental alienation and the profound psychological toll it takes on children.
To suggest that children will spontaneously awaken to years of manipulation and emotional abuse is akin to offering them a pacifier—a comforting illusion that obscures the harsh realities of their situation. Lawyers may say it. Judges may say it. And then, the targeted parent is left to navigate the treacherous waters of family court, clinging to the hope that justice will prevail.
But the reality is far more bleak. Children subjected to parental alienation often internalize their pain, grappling with conflicting loyalties and struggling to make sense of their fractured family dynamics. They may be coerced into aligning with the alienating parent, parroting their toxic narratives and rejecting the targeted parent without fully understanding the consequences of their actions.
Expecting these children to independently discern the truth amidst a sea of manipulation and gaslighting is not only unrealistic but profoundly damaging. Without proper intervention, they may carry the burden of unresolved trauma well into adulthood, perpetuating the cycle of dysfunction in their own relationships and families.
What these children truly need is therapeutic intervention from the outset—a proactive approach aimed at mitigating the impact of parental alienation and fostering resilience. This means providing access to specialized counseling and support services that help children process their experiences, develop healthy coping mechanisms, and rebuild fractured family bonds.
Furthermore, it’s imperative that family courts recognize the gravity of parental alienation and prioritize the well-being of children above all else. This may involve appointing specialized professionals to assess and address the dynamics at play, ensuring that children are shielded from further harm and provided with the support they need to heal.
Ultimately, the notion that “the kids will find out” in cases of parental alienation is a dangerous myth—one that perpetuates the cycle of harm and neglect. It’s time to abandon this passive approach and instead, take proactive steps to protect the most vulnerable members of our society. By investing in early intervention and prioritizing the well-being of children, we can begin to dismantle the destructive forces of parental alienation and build a brighter future for all families.
I’m Randy Morano—a father, author, and staunch advocate for parental alienation awareness. My journey through the depths of parental alienation has transformed me into a passionate advocate, dedicated to shedding light on this overlooked form of emotional abuse.
As a survivor, I understand the profound impact of parental alienation firsthand. Through my writing and advocacy efforts, I aim to raise awareness, empower others, and provide support to families in need. Join me in the fight for change and hope.
